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Rabbi Bob’s 2016 General Election Ballot

October 30, 2016 by Rabbi Bob Leave a Comment

rockthevote

Yes, I know you’ve been waiting to mail your ballot in until you get the word from the Rabbi himself. Wait no longer, oh confused flock! Rest assured I have it from the highest authority that the choices below are your best chance at a government that can deliver to you all the goodies you need, most importantly peace and prosperity, or at least a chance to make it through till the next time you have to vote.

Since I’ve never gotten any comments on any previous ballots I’ve recommended, I’m not going to bore you with detailed explanations for the choices below. Your best bet is to just fill in your little ovals with the green choices indicated, since they are obvious winners, suck it up and pick the red choices because they are the least evil and there are no obvious alternatives that I know of, and maybe pick the small gray choice for senator, if you can’t stomach a declared socialist.

One small note on the Rabbi’s choice for our representative. Those of you who know me may recognize the name listed. Believe it or not, I briefly considered a run for Congress with the Pacific Green Party (which you should join – IF you live in Oregon – IF you are not already a member!). I heartily believe that all Democratic Party candidates should be challenged from the left, and no one had stepped up for the PGP, so I started the process. If you’d like to be represented by someone who espouses the prinicples of the Greens, then please write me in, and if I get elected, I’ll finally have a job with a decent salary and benefits. I know you’d want that for me, and for you.

If you’ve already voted, I’m sorry, but in any case, check out the wisdom below, and if you have issues with the blessed recommendations on this most sacred of ballots, please log in and comment, or send your hate mail to my Facebook wall, or just curse me out to make yourself feel better. If you like the choices below, please share this post with all 1,000,000 of your closest friends, either real or virtual. You’ll be glad you did.

If you haven’t voted yet, you’re in luck! I assume the smartest of you will wait until Election Day to vote, because so much is happening that your choices now may not even be in consideration. Do your research, and then vote like your rabbi! I reserve the right to change my mind between now and Election Day, and you should give it a try (changing my mind) if you haven’t already. (But I can tell you that my choice for president won’t change, so don’t go there…)

So, here you go, the unofficial ballot choices of Rabbi Bob. Helluva deal! (from the Book of Bob)

Federal Offices

United States President and Vice President

 

Pacific Green, Progressive
Jill Stein / Ajamu Baraka


US Senator

Eric Navickas
Pacific Green, Progressive

Shanti S Lewallen
Working Families

US Representative, 1st District

Robert I Goldberg
Pacific Green, Write-in


State Offices

Governor
(2 Year Term)

Kate Brown
Democrat, Working Families


Secretary of State

Alan Zundel
Pacific Green


State Treasurer

Chris Henry
Progressive, Pacific Green


Attorney General

Ellen Rosenblum
Democrat, Independent, Working Families


Legislative Offices

State Representative, 32nd District

Deborah Boone
Democrat, Independent


County

Sheriff

Anybody but Bergin
Write-in


City of Astoria Ward 4

Cory C Pederson


State Measures

94 No
95 No
96 No
97 Yes
98 No
99 Yes
100 Yes


City of Astoria

4-180 Yes

 

Filed Under: Feature, Politics, ULE

About Rabbi Bob

The name Rabbi Bob comes from my role in the Coaster Theatre production of Fiddler on the Roof in 2006. In addition to writing for the Edge, I master the website and occasionally write for HIPFiSH, tutor mostly math and science at Clatsop Community College, and work as a preK-12 substitute teacher and instructional aide for school districts in the area. I love hosting Bedtime Stories on KMUN, and also love to sing with the North Coast Chorale. And yes, I love to portray other people on stage. I'm a New Yorker that has also lived in Berkeley, Adelaide and Seattle. I've lived in Astoria for the past 17 and some years (got here the day Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans).

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Readers’ Comments

  • Watt Childress April 28, 2025 at 11:48 am on Uncle Zech’s Amphibious GestaltAlso, you inspired me to insert a sentence crediting Hoyt Axton with the song's genesis. Many thanks!
  • Watt Childress April 27, 2025 at 10:55 pm on Uncle Zech’s Amphibious GestaltThank you kindly Jim for reading this and commenting. I enjoyed your review of "Sun House" by David James Duncan,
  • Jim Stewart April 27, 2025 at 8:26 pm on Uncle Zech’s Amphibious GestaltNice! Hoyt Axton wrote the Jeremiah song and sang it with great gusto. Life wanders on and I'm still glad
  • Watt Childress April 26, 2025 at 3:51 pm on Uncle Zech’s Amphibious GestaltDuring spring I think of you, and all the May Pole celebrations you've organized over the years. So grateful for
  • Watt Childress April 26, 2025 at 3:18 pm on Uncle Zech’s Amphibious GestaltIn my dreams I sing to the multitudes, with a voice as clear and sweet and churchy as Lou Reed.
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